Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Maya Handled It!

Maya was so proud of herself today -- a schoolmate made an unkind remark about her being Chinese, and Maya handled it. I told her I was so proud of her!

A little boy in her class told her she couldn't sit next to him because she is Chinese.  Maya promptly told the teacher, who told the little boy his behavior was wrong and asked him to apologize.  He did.

Yep, that exciting.  But I think Maya has been sort of expecting and dreading something happening since Zoe's encounters with the "Chinese eyes" teasing (see here and here) and the mean girl at ballet who said her skin looked dirty, like it was covered with mud.

So today it was like she'd survived a rite of passage.

Maya was giddy with excitement.

I was sad.

P.S.  I talked to the teacher involved today -- not Maya's homeroom teacher, but another first grade teacher who was there.  She clarified something Maya had said that I didn't quite understand, and it makes me even more delighted with how the teacher handled the incident.

Mrs. M. asked the boy to apologize, and then asked Maya if she forgave him.  She told Maya, in front of the boy, that Maya shouldn't say, "It's OK," in response to the boy's "I'm sorry."  What the boy did and said wasn't OK, but if he was sincerely sorry, and Maya felt she could forgive him, she should say, "I forgive you."

I really like the gravity she brought to the incident, not accepting the pro forma "it's OK."  Because it was so NOT OK.  And you shouldn't say it is when it isn't.  It certainly impressed Maya, and I bet it impressed the little boy, too (OK, I can dream!).


Chinazhoumom said...

Way to go !!! (I have been mentioning some of the tools your girls have used) on the offchance that a comment is made - (I really wanted to teach her to deck em-but had to back off that thought)
Thanks for keeping us informed !!!

patti said...

Exciting for Maya in that she realizes she is strong and can handle problems herself. Sad that she has to. Good job for preparing her.

LisaLew said...

Thumbs up for Maya AND her teacher. Sorry it happened. We can think of these situations as educational, but that sure doesn't make it better.

Anonymous said...

Kudos to Maya and the teacher!! I really like the part about saying "I forgive you" rather than "It's okay." Smart teacher.
Sue (aka anonymous)

Heather said...

Hurray for both Maya and the teacher! They both handled that so well.