I'm having difficulity understanding why you have two daughters that are adopted from China. You seem very anti-adoption at times.Either/or. For or against. Black or white. Guess what? It's all so much more complicated than that. If you don't want to deal with complexity in adoption, this probably isn't the right blog for you.
It's pretty funny to be labeled "anti-adoption" when what you're doing is criticizing CHILD TRAFFICKING. When you're criticizing UNETHICAL ADOPTION. When you're railing against CORRUPTION in international adoption. When you're recognizing that adoption brings GRIEF, PAIN AND LOSS for adoptees and birth families. When you actually accept the law of the land -- the Hague Convention on adoption -- that says that international adoption is a LAST RESORT.
If that's anti-adoption, then I guess I'm anti-adoption. Who knew?!
And then the "how can you be anti-adoption if you've adopted" thing? It's that "if you're not for us, you're against us" crap, I guess. Having "benefitted" from adoption, how DARE you criticize the institution in any way?!
Again, I say, it's more complicated than that. Yes, I've adopted and it has brought me immeasurable joy. And it has brought my children loss, pain and grief, as well as joy. It has brought their birth families loss, pain and grief. And when corruption and child trafficking enter the picture, adoption brings everyone involved even more loss, pain and grief. The only joy then is in the black hearts of corrupt officials and child traffickers.
And when adoptive parents ignore the hard truth that their experience of adoption is not the same experience as their adopted children and their birth families, when they ignore the hard truths about corruption and trafficking, they are doing damage not just to their children, but to the institution of adoption as well.
Frankly, it's going to be the over-reaching of the "pro-adoption" folks that bring an end to international adoption, not anything the so-called "anti-adoption" folks do. Haven't you noticed the pattern? A country opens to international adoption. . . just a trickle at first. Then it's push, push, push for more, more, more adoptions from that country. Now the trickle is a flood of money as more and more and more adoptive parents flock to the country. And the money brings corruption. . . . And the country shuts down to international adoption. . . . Wash. Rinse. Repeat. "Pro-adoption?" Really workin' out for you, huh?
Label me however you want. I'll keep blogging about the difficult, complicated, fraught-with ambiguities, world of adoption. There are lots of other blogs out there that won't dish up hard truths to make you uncomfortable.