Thursday, May 12, 2011

China Birth Parents Sue to Find U.S. Adopted Son

From Global Times:
A father is suing an adoption center in Jiangsu Province to help him contact his lost son adopted by an American family through the agency in 1995.

Li Xuwen, 47, a resident of Wuhu city in Anhui Province, has been looking for Li Xiang for 19 years since the 6-year-old went missing in Nanjing, Jiangsu Province in May 1992.

"He was with his mother having breakfast on a Nanjing street but disappeared inside five minutes when his mother went to buy water for him," Li told the Yangtze Evening Post on Tuesday.

Then in 2007 Li found a record at a Nanjing police station that his son had been sent to Nanjing Children's Welfare Center two months after losing contact with his parents.

He was later informed that an American family adopted his boy in 1995.

To protect the adoptive family's privacy, the center is refusing to tell Li his son's new location or contact information, the Yangtze Evening Post reported.

"We strongly urge the service center to release the name of Li Xiang's US contacts to his birth parents as it deprived those parents of their right to information about the adoption as is enshrined under the law," Li Xuwen's attorney, Deng Peng, told the Global Times on Wednesday.

"We're aware the welfare center notified Nanjing newspapers with Li Xiang's information," Deng said, "but that's just not good enough as his parents in Anhui Province couldn't read the information back in the 1990s, when communications between regions weren't efficient enough."

Through Deng's contacts, Li has found out that his son is a graduate now and believes his parents had abandoned him 19 years ago.

"We're not asking the boy to come back to China," Deng said. "We just want to tell him his parents didn't abandon him and they want to meet him and explain this to him."

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Adoptive parents are so scared about this exact scenario.

But I think the bottom line is most telling:

"We're not asking the boy to come back to China"

They should have had their child back. BUT they also know it would be unfair to the adoptive parents, who have raised this child.

Every time I hear the statement "Oh my god, I was so worried the parents would want their child back"

Well, what do you expect? For them to shut off all emotions regarding their own child?

It's not like "birth" parents are coming to the front doors of American homes. They already know the child emotionally belongs to the adoptive parents.

c said...

Malinda - I'd love to see your take on this question:
http://www.chinalawblog.com/2011/05/are_adopted_chinese_babies_like_stolen_cars.html

Anonymous said...

So the young man is now twenty five? It seems to me this no longer involves the people who raised him. Its between him and the biological parents he was kidnapped from. It's understandable that the agency doesn't want to identify the people who raised the child, but why can't they contact the young man for the parents and let him know what happened? All they want to do it notify an adult that he was never abandoned by his parents. Certainly, he has every right to know that.

Linda said...

anon wrote:

"They should have had their child back. BUT they also know it would be unfair to the adoptive parents, who have raised this child."

Do they? I see then saying this as a way to ease the fears of the guilty parties. Fair has nothing to do with this. Their child was kidnapped, the adoption should not even be considered legal, and no consideration should be given to these ap's or the bogus agency that facilitated his "adoption.

"Every time I hear the statement "Oh my god, I was so worried the parents would want their child back"

Yeah....especially if their child was stolen. Ap's SHOULD worry about this, as should every human being.

"It's not like "birth" parents are coming to the front doors of American homes. They already know the child emotionally belongs to the adoptive parents. "

Really? That is an ap statement that reeks of ownership and entitlement. Adoptees are human beings, not possessions, regardless if they were purchased through a "credible" broker, or a black market broker who illegally obtained the child.

That statement also shows how ill-informed you are about the bonds adoptees have with their first families- whether they were voluntarily relinquished, or obtained in a manner such as this. We are NOT "blank slates". We had families BEFORE our a families, and those bonds don't go away. In this case, the child knows what happened. I cannot imagine the sheer horror he has gone through...KNOWING he had a family, KNOWING he was kidnapped, and did not possess the language skills to tell his captors the truth. This story is disgusting, and unfortunately not at all uncommon in the world of international adoption. This was yet another obvious case of human trafficking.

Anonymous said...

"That is an ap statement that reeks of ownership and entitlement."

I was merely stating what I've observed. I wasn't defending anyone, least of all adoptive parents.

"That statement also shows how ill-informed you are about the bonds adoptees have with their first families- whether they were voluntarily relinquished, or obtained in a manner such as this."

Lower your hackles, Linda. I *am* an adoptee.

Linda said...

Lol. My "hackles" weren't up. That statement is one that many ap's use frequently, and I found it incredibly sad that anyone would try to protect the ap's in this story, and it seemed like that is what you were doing.

Anonymous said...

Well, I'm not an adoptive parent.

"That statement is one that many ap's use frequently"

Yes, I know.

"I found it incredibly sad that anyone would try to protect the ap's in this story, and it seemed like that is what you were doing"

Let me put it this way:

If there was a way to legally return the child to his biological parents, I am quite sure that it would be the ethical thing to do.

But what I was saying before is that the biological parents would feel they "owe" their child to the adoptive parents. Even if the adoptive parents were willing to give the child back to the rightful parents.

If you were to speak to the (biological) parents, that is what they would say, which is quite telling by the statement:

"We're not asking the boy to come back to China."

fyi: I believe in the mother & child bond. I'm not arguing with you on that, or really, any of this. I actually did not know you frequent this blog as I've commented here a number of times.

Anonymous said...

To Anon. and Linda,

How fascinating your comments were to watch unfold. I find it very telling that Linda would presume that Anon. was an AP, clearly generating the ugly statements she "expects" them to make. What a surprise and bummer it must have been to find out the ideas were from an adoptee!

LOL What a change in attitude she had once learning that Anon. was in fact an adoptee. Hmmm...interesting that someone who is so outspoken and clearly resentful of all AP's would then continue to carry this torch of directed anger at the AP population even when confronted with the knowledge of said comments coming from a fellow Adoptee.

Lesson learned? Take Linda's biased and hateful comments with that same proverbial "grain of salt" that she attributes to other honest voices on this forum.

How completely hypocritical and almost amusing in its bias.

Thanks Anon. for this!! Truly!

Sign me fellow adoptee anon. fed up with meaningless vitriol.

Anonymous said...

To the second anon.:

You're welcome. ;P
Indeed, it *has* been rather amusing to see how she has responded to me.

Particularly since I know she would have had a different reaction/response had I used a different name...

Anonymous said...

Yet not the same Anon from the other conversation.

LisaLew said...

I would hope there is enough publicity that this young man gets connected with his First Family. What a gift that would be. The FF's suit could go on for years, right, Malinda? So, while they are waiting for all the bureaucratic hoopla that may or may not get them anywhere....

I wonder if they could post pics of him here, the way many American families do in China? Maybe hook up with some adovacates here to help!

So sad for all parties involved. Surely his AP thought the adoption was on the up and up. And serious suffering for the First Family.