Maya is talking more and more about her birth parents in the past few weeks. She's been pretty disinterested up to now, once declaring that talking about adoption was boooorinnggggg! Even though she's listened in on all of my conversations with Zoe, she needs to plow the same ground for herself.
The other day she asked, "Do you think my birth mother ever thinks about me?" I answered that we don't know her birth mother, so we can't know for sure what she's thinking, but that I've talked to lots of birth mothers who say they never stop thinking of their child. Maya then said, "But she has lots of kids, so I bet she doesn't think about me." I said we didn't know whether she has brothers and/or sisters in China, but even if she did, I said, I don't think it would make a difference in whether her birth mother still thinks about her. "I have two kids, and I'd still think about both of you even if I lost one of you." Maya said, "So you think she'd look at her other kids and there'd be a whole where I'm missing?" Smart cookie. "I think it would be exactly like that," I reply.
You can assure Maya that I am one of those birthmothers and I think of my daughter, soon to be 24, every single day for the past 24 years. She is always with me. Always missed. Always loved.
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