An Adoptee Speaks About His Two Disrupted Adoptions

Finally! The New York Times brings us the voice of an adopted person in all this discussion of disruption (I've mentioned before my frustration that the NYT doesn't include adoptees in their debates about adoption):

And, finally, this morning on my parenting segment on PRI’s radio show “The Takeaway,” I had a chance to talk to Orlando Modeno, who left a comment here on
Motherlode last week describing his life after his adoptive parents “gave him back.” He was 10 years old when he was taken to Woodstock, N.Y., from Colombia, to be the son of parents who spoke no Spanish, when he spoke no English. Four years later, they terminated their rights and he went to live with another family, who eventually “returned” him as well.

In an e-mail to me, he agreed to share his story further:

I think it’s important to educate people about how traumatic it is for an international adoptee to be uprooted from his/her homeland. My objective is to raise awareness among potential adoptive parents so they really understand what adoption really is from an adoptee’s point of view and how it will affect an adoptee.

For me, it was a rupture that split me apart, a fragmentation of my identity (both culturally and psychologically), it stymied my emotional and psychological growth, it affected my ability to trust people (and myself), and to develop healthy emotional attachments with anyone. I felt destroyed in every sense of the word.

Included is a link to the radio show.