Remember Anita Tedaldi? She wrote a New York Times piece that told only part of the story of her decision to relinquish her internationally adopted son?
Well, she told her story on the Today Show today. Also on the program, Adam Pertman of the Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute, and he made three good points: 1) failure to bond is not just an adoption problem since it can happen with biological children, too; 2) adoption is not a "rental" where you just try it out; 3) sometimes it takes years to bond, and parents should stick it out for as long as they can.
This time, Tedaldi did mention her previous column, We Can't Trade In Our Children or Our Husbands, where she criticized another family for disrupting their adoption. She did not, however, mention that she had two more biological children in the 18 months that she was trying -- and failing -- to bond with her newly-adopted child.
P.S. There is an active comment thread at a previous post about Tedaldi. Click here to read the new comments. Most of the commenters are new to the blog, I think, being one of the 2,000 or so folks whose google search for Anita Tedaldi has brought them here! I figured regular readers weren't re-checking previous posts, so thought you'd need a heads-up to look for the new comments if you're interested.
I heard them tease the story this morning and was interested, but had a little one in the room and thought it better to watch later! I'm so glad Adam was able to make those points and that they had him on to "balance" the story. I can't help but wonder how her former son's (how best to say that?) new family feels about her continuing to seek the spotlight?
ReplyDeleteI hated the way she kept referring to him as 'The Child, D' It was so cold. I would say the problem was that she was not attaching to him, and then when she had the other 2 children things came to a head. I didn't feel any sympathy for her. I think D is in a better place now in the end.
ReplyDeleteYes, I agree. I have to believe the child is in a better home. I truly hope he's got unconditional love now.
ReplyDeleteWonder how much money she is making on all this press? Any guesses on if she will be donating it or keeping it?
she brings new meaning to the word selfish. There should be a stronger word to describe her actions. Horrifying comes to mind. If there's a presumed mental illness, I am not buying it. Her actions were quite deliberate.
ReplyDeleteI bet she's gearing up to write a book. I find her self promotion disturbing. Thankfully she isn't D's mother anymore. He deserves better.
ReplyDeleteI am absolutely shocked! How on earth could anybody possibly decide to adopt a child without considering that this poor little thing who had been found all alone on a street (!!!) might have a hard time bonding with anybody??? After his relatives had so cruelly abandoned him!!! And then she had two more biological children and when it all started to be too exhausting, she just threw out what was not biologically "hers"??? I can't believe it. And I found it deeply disturbing too how she referred to him as "the child". Most certainly she has no love for him at all. Disgusting.
ReplyDeleteA.T. has a book scheduled to come out in Mar. 2010 (co-written with another "military mom"). So I'm pretty sure that's why she's not going away. I won't post the title here, but if you Google her name and "book" you'll find it. Get this: it's a parenting book.
ReplyDeleteMalinda- Just letting you know that I linked to this post. Thank you for your research regarding this case.
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